I have done far more than 5 foolish things in my life. Heck, sometimes it's 5 foolish things before the day even gets started, but here are some zingers. I hope you'll link up and share your stories.
5 Foolish Things
I got kicked out of the Detroit Zoo for life.
So it went a little something like this. I was in the 4th grade, on a field trip and decided to go swimming in the aviary fountains at the zoo.
How disgusting is that?
Then my friend Sarah and I got a little bolder and went swimming in the main entrance fountain.
Where exactly was our chaperone?
Needless to say, they took our sorry soggy selves to the security office and told us that we were KICKED OUT FOR LIFE!
I went on a date on Christmas.
This one really deserves a post of its own, but yeah...bad idea. It all started when he said he needed to drop something off at his sister's and he left me in the car for 90 MINUTES (before I had a cell phone). Then we went to see the Andy Kaufman movie (Man on the Moon) and he told me that he didn't think I'd really understand what was going on because of my age.
Okay, how old are you exactly GRANDPA??
I got into a stranger's car.
Why the planners of the Greenbelt metro station in DC decided to build out instead of up I'll never know. But I'm pretty sure some guy lost a bet and that's why you have to walk for at least 20-30 minutes to get from the back of the lot to the metro itself.
It was well over 100°F out, I think closer to 120° in the first week of July and a dude was endlessly circling the lot mid-day. He asked if he could give me a ride to my spot, and honestly I couldn't have jumped in faster. It was only after I closed the door that I realized how crazy unsafe the whole thing was.
But he dropped me off, got his space and I didn't have to walk a mile---win, win!
Just don't tell my kid.
I bought a house, got married and quit my job.
All in 30 days! I'm not sure what kind of manic pressure cooker I thought I was able to handle, but hands down the most stressful month of my life.
I went through Target with my left boob hanging out.
In all fairness I was a new mother and apparently hadn't quite fully grasped the concept of making sure I had my business together before I left the house. It was a big excursion in those early days and I'm betting we spent a good 90 minutes strolling the aisles. It was only after I was safely back in my car that I noticed I hadn't closed all the bells and whistles on my nursing top. Thank goodness I still had an ever so attractive nursing bra on.
Looking back I like to think that people weren't pointing and staring or sniveling behind my back. But, instead silently looking at me and thinking, "Sister, I've had days like that too! You'll get your shit together soon."
NEXT WEEK: (4/13/2012) 5 Things About Friday the 13th (scary, funny, ironic, etc.)
Come play along!
- Use words, vlogs, photos to make your list of 5 and publish it on your blog.
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